If it wasn't for the Covenant, you'd think me just as much an irredeemable monster as Palmer did. Please admit at least that much. I don't wish to be pitied, nor do I wish to be coddled.
[A sigh.] And, starting now, I believe I deserve some space and time to come to terms with things myself. Do you really need me?
More than anything I'd like to pretend that none of this happened, but reality being what it is, and my damnable brain being what it is, I'm forced to logically examine the situation and be reminded of what I am and what I apparently will become. I'd like to say that running to your arms and crying and mourning is a good idea, but for me it isn't. I would be sitting there wondering if you truly forgive me for anything, or if I even want forgiveness.
I never wanted you to know.
[His words had just... made her retreat in on herself.]
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2013-04-09 03:52 am (UTC)[She turns back.]
If it wasn't for the Covenant, you'd think me just as much an irredeemable monster as Palmer did. Please admit at least that much. I don't wish to be pitied, nor do I wish to be coddled.
[A sigh.] And, starting now, I believe I deserve some space and time to come to terms with things myself. Do you really need me?
More than anything I'd like to pretend that none of this happened, but reality being what it is, and my damnable brain being what it is, I'm forced to logically examine the situation and be reminded of what I am and what I apparently will become. I'd like to say that running to your arms and crying and mourning is a good idea, but for me it isn't. I would be sitting there wondering if you truly forgive me for anything, or if I even want forgiveness.
I never wanted you to know.
[His words had just... made her retreat in on herself.]